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| Moo needs help. |
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| So I decide I need to talk to someone. Professionally. |
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| I tell Dr. Brian that nothing seems to make me happy anymore. Everyone I date bores me, I hate my job, I don't even want Honey back. |
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| He tells me that he thinks decoupage is fun, have I tried that? Also, unscrewing the tops of salt shakers in diners is fun too. |
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| After he tells me the entire "Sheila thought she was a cat!" story, I tell him I think our time is up. |
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| I thank him for his time and cigarettes. |
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| And he dips me. Like you do. |
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| But I think Dr. Brian is right, I need to find something in my life that makes me happy that doesn't have anything to do with anyone else. So I try paint by numbers. |
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And I water all my dead plants. |
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| And start a lesbian detective novel. It's about a really cute private detective. And she has a dog named Joe. And she just broke up with her girlfriend, Cinnamon. |
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| I clean my apartment. |
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| And read the newspaper for the first time. Mmmm, who knew? |
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| And play pool for hours... |
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| until the phone rings. |
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| Oh who cares, I was gonna quit anyway. |
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| I decide to become a lawyer or something like that. |
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| So I go downtown to study and look up online law schools. |
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| Oh, it's one drink. |
Can Moo really change? |
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